The holiday season is a time of joy, connection and celebrations, but for some it is otherwise. For some, it is increased tension, emotional and physical stress and isolation. For individuals experiencing domestic violence (DV), this is an extremely tough time because there is reduced contact with their social support, high expectations and they may feel even more vulnerable and stuck. As friends, family or coworkers, it is important to be aware of the signs that someone might be experiencing abuse and know how to respond effectively.

Warning Signs to look out for:

  • Physical Signs: this can look like unexplained bruises, frequent explanation of “accidents”, changes in clothing choices to cover injuries
  • Emotional Abuse: this looks like hypervigilance around their partner or certain people, avoiding social gatherings, anxiety, extreme jealousy, subtle threats of violence from the abuser.
  • Financial control: the victim may appear stressed about spending, they may constantly ask for permission before spending, they may have limited access to their finances.
  • Isolation signs: the victim avoids or cuts off family and friends; they rarely leave their home unless they are accompanied by the partner

What you can do to support:

  • Approach them with compassion: expressing your concerns in private and without judgement is a way you can support someone experiencing domestic violence. Let them know you are worried and highlight their strengths to help them build confidence.
  • Prioritize safety: it is important that you make sure you and the person experiencing abuse are safe. Avoid confrontation with the abuser even when tempted, the goal is to offer support and options to the person being abused.
  • Provide resources: encourage them to reach out to a confidential hotline, you can also offer to help them find services, so they don’t feel overwhelmed.
  • Respect their pace and choices: leaving an abusive relationship is hard and it can be complicated emotionally and financially. Remember, it is important that you support them, not put pressure on them.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, here are some local and national resources you can use and recommend:

Local Services:

  • Equinox Domestic Violence Services: Hotline: (518 432-7865), offers crisis intervention, residential shelter, non- residential services like counseling and advocacy.
  • Albany County Crime Victim & Sexual Violence Center: Hotline: (518 447-7716), offers crisis services, counseling and advocacy for DV victims

National Hotlines:

The holiday season is a time for celebration and sadness for some. While many can celebrate those around them, others might be in isolation and live in fear. If you or anyone you know is experiencing domestic violence, remember you are not alone, help is available, do reach out or refer them to Capital EAP. Our counselors at Capital EAP are ready and available to help guide you on this journey. You can reach out to us at 518-465-3813 to connect with our intake team, who can help you set up an appointment.

By: Oreoluwa Afolabi, MHC Intern