Kale Found to be Linked to Poor Mood

1Here at Capital EAP we take pride in being able to share knowledge about mental health topics that we think may be of interest to our readers, whether it be related to mood, self-care, depression, anxiety, relationships, and even what we consume and put into our bodies. A very recent study has shown that a very popular green you can find in your local grocery store may just be contributing to your poor mood.

A recent study conducted by Dr. Tootledoo and her team of self-taught Nutritionists has found that the leafy green commonly referred to as “Kale” can cause a whole slew of unfortunate emotions in those who choose to consume the undesirable plant. In her study, Dr. Tootledoo had her lab technicians (who lovingly came to be known as the “food gurus”) separate a group of college students into three pairs. The groups were randomly selected by a computer software so as to avoid any accidental characteristics among group members that may have affected the outcome of the study.

All of the groups of students were told that they would be provided with dinner, followed by an evening of social banter and intermingling. The first group was given a hearty Chef Salad, the second group given a plate of cold, lifeless kale, and the third group (the control group) were given one mint tic-tac. Following dinner, all three groups were instructed to fill out a mood survey, after which they were all brought into a separate meeting room to have an evening of social interaction. The results of the study were astounding! What the researchers found was that the group given the slimy, tasteless kale showed significantly more irritation, depressed mood, and aggravation than the control group or the group that had been given a filling salad. In one instance, one of the students from the kale group even growled at another student during the discussion portion of the study, stating, “Well you would be this grumpy too if you have been given kale for dinner!”

In post-study interviews many of the students in the kale group displayed levels of remorse for having had to consume a giant bowl of kale. “I feed this stuff to my lizard.” Wendy Williams, and Graduate student in the Communications Department remarked. Another student, who requested to remain anonymous, even went on to say, “I don’t even think Dr. Tootledoo is a real doctor.”

Whether kale is the culprit, or the group members in the kale group were just really irritated that day, are still up for debate. What we do know, is that we need more research on kale and its effect on mood, before deciding that it should banned from all grocery stores.

Happy April Fool’s Day! Obviously this a joke article and I hope that it brought some joy in these times of great uncertainty. Kale has NOT been proven to cause a poor mood, however just due to taste, you’d think that it would. I hope everyone stays safe and healthy, and practices appropriate social distancing and hand washing!

By Marion R. White, MHC-LP, Capital EAP Counselor